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Monthly Archives: April 2010

Give me the simple life

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I feel bad for my literally drop off the face of my wordpress earth….. but life has been…. well, it’s not been dull let’s put it that way.

Being 1700 miles from our families has never been more painful than it has been these last 10 days.Β  There are some things going on there that we really want to be there for…. none of it good. Being so far makes you feel like your hands are literally tied, you feel hopeless for yourselves and those you love who are hurting, and in some ways it feels like the world closes in on you.

With the stress and fear of the last 10 days, I have found myself wanting SIMPLE. Anything simple. I find that I am more annoyed with little things too….. like annoyances I find in people. I think to myself “I don’t have time for unimportant things at the moment, and you in comparison to what is going on in our families lives, are not important.” I know…not very gracious of me, but still. My tolerance has definately gone way down. 😐 I find that this is a huge test of how far I have grown in the last 6 months. This is another circumstance that has spiritual warfare written all over it.

Speaking of spiritual warfare, I just finished the book When The Enemy Strikes by Charles Stanley. LIFE CHANGING!!!! If you read nothing else your entire life, read this book. This will be a book I reread over and over again. Our bible study group also just started a study on spiritual warfare by Jack Kuhatschek. So excited to do this study! I think that all of this is perfectly timed (imagine that, God having perfect timing!) with what is going on the lives of our family back home, and some things we have been presented with here in our own family. I told Jake that I feel like right now we are focused on what is happening in the lives of others, while some things here within our own family have fallen by the wayside. We had a big wake-up call discussion about it the other night…. again, perfectly timed…. because if we had let it go any longer we would have gone down an old familiar road again. I could just feel it going that way (thanking God for that discernment) so I am glad we opened our eyes when we did. It feels good to get on the same page again. We now know though not to let our guard down so easily when we are so focused on other trials as well. We still have to remain watchful and always on guard for our own marriage, our own family, at all times.

Back to wanting the simple….. I joked with a friend the other night that I feel like I’m having a “late 20’s life crisis.” πŸ˜† I suddenly feel like I want to move to the country, middle of nowhere, not have ANY neighbors, get rid of my stuff, have the bare minimum, and eat off my own land. πŸ˜† See! I sound slightly like I’ve lost my mind! But truly, I want less. I want less in my life. Less things to clutter my sight (literally and figuratively). Less clothes to wash. Less furniture to dust. Less dishes to dirty. LESS. A friend is selling her house, and while for our family it would be way too small, I still wanted it. I looked at her pictures and thought in my mind how it could work. We could get rid of half of our stuff (more really) and make it work. Just to get off of base, where I feel like we’re packed in like sardines, and have our own space….. our own big backyard, our own house that isn’t also attached to another one where we hear (and smell!) everything. I’m tired of the neighbors cigarette smoke coming into my bathroom through the vents! (oh yes!) I want my own space. I want simple.

I asked my friend if we could look at her house this weekend….. but she said there wereΒ  alreayd two offers on it…. so that was that. I know…it was seriously a ridiculous idea of mine, but I just feel a little trapped at the moment and the idea of “getting out” seemed so nice! πŸ˜† I started to think though…why can’t I do all that now? Just because we have a large house, doesn’t mean I have to fill it to the brim with STUFF. So, today I started to do that. I am starting to simplify. I feel VERY excited at that thought! I think this has been a long time coming though….. in the last two months or so I’ve gotten rid of probably two truckloads of stuff, and today got rid of a ton more! If I can keep this up I will be on to simpler things! πŸ˜‰

This will all have to suffice for at least another 10 years when we can retire and become crazies that live in the middle of nowhere and sit on our front porch with shotguns. πŸ˜† hahahahaha!!!!!! Just kidding. We’ll be living on the Southern Oregon Coast. πŸ˜‰

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While dinner thaws….

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….. I thought I’d update really quick about the INSANELY busy life I’m apparently living. Feels insanely busy, but probably isn’t as much as I think. I’m sure once I get into the swing of things it’ll get more manageable, and then we’ll take our month long trip and I’ll start all over again.

Working at the coffee shop has been GREAT! I absolutely love it. I love being around it again, making drinks again, remembering the ropes, and the people…. being an avid people watcher this is pure entertainment for me. A different person every 2-3 minutes…. I love it. Jake and I were talking the other night about it and he asked how much it costs to start up this kind of business. He suggested we start putting away a fraction of our tax refund every year so that when he retires from the AF (10 more years at least) I can start my own (what I’ve wanted to do for almost 10 years now!) without getting loans to do it. So, that is my dream plan….we’ll see if we put it to practice starting next year though. I hope we do!

Dylan’s art was selected to be on display at two different events (one at the mall, another at the art museum in town) and he was the ONLY kindergartner out of four classes to be selected! When I found out I was SO PROUD of him! I only wish we had been notified in enough time to actually go and see it on display. They didn’t send out any information to the parents (at least, I didn’t get any!) and it was in the newsletter for THIS month….but the events were in March. 😐  If you follow me on FB you know I was NOT a happy mama! I’ve emailed his teacher (it was nice, I even had Papa look it over! haha!) and am waiting on her reply.

We are just a few weeks out from our trip home. We’ve planned and prepared about as much as possible without actually packing up and going…. the trailer is even here at the house so Jake can do some upkeep on it before we leave. The bummer deal is that it’s looking like we might need to buy new batteries AND a new tire for one side. That is a few hundred right there. LAME!

We are buying my moms van when we go home. We need it to bring my nieces back here with us anyway, and it would help us a lot now to have two vehicles. Before it made sense to have just one, but now with me working and being so busy with MOPS and the bible study I go to…. it just makes sense to keep it. We had intended on paying her for it monthly until we got our tax refund next year to pay her the rest in one lump sum, but she decided to just wait to pay her until then anyway. VERY NICE! That is a huge blessing and one less worry for us. Very excited about that. Not so excited about driving back here “by myself” even though I will be following Jake in the trailer. I’ve never driven that far (ever!) and done ANY of the driving. Jake never lets me drive. πŸ˜†

I am SO EXCITED for Dylan to be out of school! I feel like I have “senioritis” about him going this month since technically this is his last month considering we wont be here for May. It will make things so much easier for Jake on the mornings I work…and I won’t have to worry about asking my neighbor to take him to school those mornings. I’m a little nervous though about finding curriculum this summer for him to start in the fall. I’ve also been wondering WHEN we’ll start…. whether we start in August like schools here…or wait a bit longer. I feel like I want to wait a bit longer (not too long though) to give us time to prepare after the girls go back home and after my maybe trip in August.

My maybe trip in August…. Nashville again for the MOPS convention. I won’t know that though until about June or July really. I am way excited about that! I hope it works out!

Okay, I think that about wraps it up for now. I know I am forgetting stuff but this gets me up to speed. Sorry it’s a bit of a boring one! πŸ˜†

My 100 Things: 21-30

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21. Sometimes I lack the physical and mental energy it takes to make new friends. Moving every few years means making new friends every few years, and sometimes it gets old and tiring. After the new friends are made though, it’s always worth it.

22. I wish we could pick one place and stay for a long time. Long enough grow “roots” somewhere. Whatever “roots” are. I want them where I live.

23. But I don’t want to live where I have roots. We both agree that we don’t want to “retire” back in our hometown…. the closest we’d go back and actually live would be a few hours. Don’t ask why. We don’t know. πŸ˜• As us again in 10 years and that answer could be totally different too.

24. I’m a big fan of spicy food, thanks to my first pregnancy. That is also when I decided I liked tomatoes and sour cream. And green peppers. And red peppers.

25. I am a REALLY loud laugher…. like, sometimes it’s obnoxious and I try very hard to be aware of it when I reach that level. But it’s hard. Because usually when I do reach that level of loud obnoxious laughing…I’m too far gone. Sorry if you’re ever around that. πŸ˜• ha!

26. I’m discovering that I like leadership…even though it scares me. A lot.

27. I obsess about dying at times…. to the point of worrying a lot about my kids if it should ever happen while they are still young. And I don’t ever want them to be so young that they don’t remember me. It’s morbid. I know.

28. I make funny mouth noises when I think no one can hear me, only to realize that sometimes they can and then I have to explain myself. It’s not often, it’s just…. a thing.

29. I talk A LOT during movies. If I annoy you, just tell me…. you won’t hurt my feelings.

30. I am particularly bothered with people who commit to something, and then don’t do it “just because.” Like, an illness or emergency is one thing. Other reasons don’t count. I could use more grace in this area I think.

My 100 Things:1-20

Never thought I’d cry watching Veggie Tales!

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The boys and I watched the Veggie Tales Easter Carole movie tonight. I thought this song by Rebecca St. James in the movie was beautiful, and what a great Easter song! Hope you enjoy and have a great Easter weekend!

There’s a story that started on Christmas
When a baby was born in the night
And those who came far, who followed the star
Were seeing a heavenly sight …
a heavenly sight.

Well the years hurried by, and the boy, now a man
Could make the blind see with a touch of his hand
He was born to be King — he was Rabbi and Priest
But the best that he had, he gave to the least …
He gave to the least.

He was born and he died, almost 2,000 years ago
He laughed and he cried, he felt all the fears we know
But what does it matter? A story so strange …
Even if it is true, what does it change?
What does it change?

Well he spoke like a prophet — like no one they’d heard
This simple young carpenter — crowds hung on every word
He hated injustice — He taught what is right
He said “I am the way, and the truth, and the light.”

His friends soon believed that truly he was the one.
The Savior, Messiah, God’s one and only son.
But others, they doubted, they did not agree
So they took him, they tried him,
He died on a tree …
He died on a tree.

God has made a way
for all who mourn and grieve
Death will never be the end
if you just believe.

There is nothing left to fear
nothing Heaven knows
For he died for us to give us life
and to give us hope He rose
He died for us to give us life
And to give us hope He rose.

Thoughts from the bathroom floor…..

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as I laid on the floor of the bathroom last night shaking and praying “Please God spare me!” over and over, I had a few interesting thoughts…. even came up withΒ a “rotovirus, rotovirus” poem. Fortunately I remember some of it….or UNfortunately, depending on how you look at it. πŸ˜•

Chemotherapy for instance was one thought. I thought of my grandma and all the times she had chemo treatments and how sick they made her. I thought of Jake’s cousin who had chemo back in December and as a mom how helpless that must feel to be that sick and not do the things that make you feel like a mom.

I thought about the person who designed the first toilet. Really, why that shape? Maybe I just have an ugly toilet though… it is quite ugly. Why not something more asthetic, easier to clean, different colors perhaps? Ya know, white shows EVERYTHING. πŸ˜•

I was grateful that just two days prior I had cleaned the bathrooms TOP TO BOTTOM so the fact that I was now laying on the floor with a sheet, pillow, and blanket didn’t bother as much as it would have three days ago.

Toilet paper holders… since I stared at one for a better part of the night I realized that we don’t even USE ours. Any of them really. We’re not toilet paper holder fans. In fact, all the little spinner things that actually go IN the toilet paper roll are all MIA. I would like to just fill in those holes in the wall and put the TP on the back of the toilet. Or a TP stand. Or pay someone to stand there and hold it for me. No? Yeah, NO.Β SOMETHING other than the roller though. Hate those things.

rotovirus, rotovirus

I hate you.

rotovirus, rotovirus

you make me feel so blue

rotovirus, rotovirus

won’t you go away

rotovirus, rotovirus

just how long will you stay?!

You give me the urge to purge

the noodles I had for dinner

and hug this ugly porcelin throne

while saying words that would make me a sinner!

rotovirus, rotovirus

they say you’re the quickest way

to lost those last 5 pounds and make me 1 size thinner!

rotovirus, rotovirus

will all due respect

I’ll keep my 5 pounds and size 8 jeans

I’d rather lose that weight by eating salad greens……

or something like that!

and that was about the extent of it. Thank goodness right?!  😯

Now I will hopefully attempt to shower and get dressed today and take care of a few things. The world doesn’t stop just because you spent the night on the cusp of throwing up. No no… laying on the bathroom floor all night doesn’t get you out of Mom-Duty either.

Where’s my sick leave? πŸ˜•