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Who spilled my glass?

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On a good day, I’m the annoying chick in the middle.

On a normal day, I’m the one on the right. Most days I’m a “glass half full” kinda girl.

Today, I’m the downer on the left thinking about all things negative and wondering when my glass will get tipped over. 😕

My biopsy results came back as abnormal. Now I am referred to a dermatologist who will finish cutting out the two moles making sure to get all the edges because the edges “don’t look good.” While there I intend on having her check out the rest of my spot covered body.

My mind has bounced back and forth between “the morons at the base clinic don’t know how to read a biopsy so they are making me go elsewhere” and “they are cancerous and don’t want to be the ones to tell me so they’re sending me elsewhere.”

Both I know are extremes, but when a nurse tells you that she can’t tell you either way and that you need to see a specialist to have them look again…. you worry a bit. That, and my albino white skin doesn’t give me much hope. 😉

So, today, I’m a glass half empty girl.

Tonight though I pray that I wake up with my cup overflowing again in the morning.

I know that I have not been given anything concrete to worry about.

I know that I will see a doctor sooner rather than later.

I know that I have faithful friends who pray daily, even when I don’t ask them too.

I have friends I know I can email and they will pray that moment.

I know that if I let Him, God will give me the peace that surpasses my understanding…. surpasses my lack of knowledge at this given moment.

All those things remind me that my cup is indeed, half full.


7 responses »

  1. Very sorry to hear about what your having to deal with. I will be sending my love your way, and hoping to hear the final test come back negative for cancer.

    Just this Monday another blog buddy you know, Indian Lake Papa, posted that his doctors found a cancerous spot on his skin, which as he says is very treatable.

    Almost all of my aunt’s and uncles in my fathers Irish family developed skin cancer at some point. None had any lasting affects. Skin problems is something us fair skinned people have unfortunately had to learned to deal with.

    It sucks that you still don’t have a complete answer, even after having had a biopsy. Going to a doctor who can give you the answers you need is the best thing at this point.

  2. Ed, yes I saw Papa’s post on that. I commented after you though I think.

    My frustration IS after going through that biopsy and waiting two weeks only to hear…. “eh, we don’t know. Could be bad, could be good, go here instead.” 😐

    Being fair skinned is a bit scary at times and whenever I see new freckles pop up I get a little antsy. Aidan has a TON of freckles on his face. It’s SO cute on him, but just shows me that I’ll need to be so vigilante about their skin. Dylan has freckles now too….Owen not yet.

    I do believe I’ll be stocking up even more on sunscreen this year! :-\

  3. Why oh why didn’t I think to come here and visit you?! Oh how I have missed you! lol!!

    I am praying for you girl, and God has only good for you…a future and a hope, so I’m confident you are gonna come out of this as much of His princess as when you went it…and all will be well:) He’s just that way ya know 😉

    So nice to “hear” you again!!

  4. roxanne kristina

    hey girly,

    …checked out of blogging and fb, but check in once in while… hope all’s well… sorry bout the blues, but I know “this too shal pass.”… busy chasing kids, etc… miss you all but needed to take break…


    • I understand that need! I’m actually bummed that Lent will be over soon and so will my FB break…. but I have plans to fix that so it’s not so distracting. 😉

      Glad you come back around every once in awhile. 😉

  5. Wow. Y’all have had more than your share of trials. All I can think is that it must be somehow connected to your search to be a better you, and how Satan loves to try and pull us down.

    And hey, for what it’s worth, I think you are a glass half full chick, and I believe wholeheartedly that that is a God given gift, not given to everyone, and you do a knock out job all the time……you certainly should be allowed to have a break from that every once in a while.

    Additionally….I rather detest doctors. It’s my experience in the military that repeatedly solidified my loathing of the medical profession. So sorry you had to go through this. And glad that today you are healthy and well.


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