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Memory Lane: 1st Edition

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I can’t believe I am going to do this. I feel like I’m posting a naked picture of myself or something. πŸ˜• ew.

I told Ed and Ric once several months back that I had folders of poems I had written a LONG time ago. Back during that “writer” phase. I also said once we unpacked I’d put a few up on my blog. After my “identity” post the other day I started going through boxes and found some. Instead of overloading my blog withΒ a bunch of teenage angst all at once, I thought I’d do it over the course of several posts. I also found a collection of poems that I saved from any and everywhere. I want to add those too because they are some of my favorites. Here’s some to get this party started. πŸ˜‰

The price I must pay

for this profit is loss

but you could not explain this logic

to my heart

I know it is right in the sight of

my God

but my heart is dying to differ

It cries and it screams

and it breaks all day long

and the nights are far gone from better

I awake from my sleep

toΒ a tear soaken pillow

and heart that has been shattered

waiting for mend

As I lay there and think

“my life is on end”

God sends me a peace

that mends.

I am not sure when I wrote that. It was in highschool sometime, as pretty much all of them were. You know, in highschool the world is just so dramatic and earth shattering. πŸ˜† However, I’m still quite dramatic. Just this morning I had a bit of a dramatic flare up when I discovered the epiglottisΒ in Aidan and Dylan’s throat. That’s a post for another time. Call me stupid, but I didn’t even know that ugly thing existed.

Here’s another for your viewing pleasure. πŸ˜‰ I had to write a poem in language arts class about a chapter in the book Snow Falling On Cedars. Here is what resulted….

Drawing up for myself

Β in the silence of my mind

a list of the things

now cluttering my heart…..

father is gone

soon everyone with a

Japanese face

on San Piedro will

be sent away

until the war is over

I have a hakujin boyfriend

I can only

see in

secret

On top of these

insoluble things

Mom has only hours before

probed into the pit of her soul

discovering her deep uncertainty.

Reading that now, I have NO CLUE what any of that means. HAHA!! πŸ˜†

Okay, I’m cringing. Feedback people. *eyes clamped shut*

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17 responses »

  1. i love your poems, friend. have you written any recently? WILL you???? (thanks for being bare-naked enough to share them with us!)

    Reply
  2. Alece, I haven’t written in YEARS. I don’t think I’ve written a single poem since I got married. It’s too overwhelming now to try. I don’t think I could, at all. The thought of it frightens me. Seriously. πŸ˜•

    Reply
  3. i think you should. set aside the overwhelmingness and scariness and just write. don’t write for us or for anyone else. just write…

    Reply
  4. oh yeah, if I did do it, I wouldn’t be putting it here! 😯 haha!

    the ones I am putting here are ones I LIKE. πŸ˜‰

    Reply
  5. don’t underestimate yourself.

    Reply
  6. I LOVE the first one. So good. The second, I’m with you on…lol. Thanks for sharing them though πŸ˜‰
    ❀

    Reply
  7. poetry is not for an audience its for an unveiling of your own heart.

    My 7th grade English teacher pounded that into me. I’m old. That’s a VERY long time ago. I have .99 spirals everywhere with finished and unfinished poems, but I write and continue too.

    It’s like my tap.. Then my souls spills out…

    Don’t put a plug in your tap because of fear.
    Let it overflow.

    Reply
  8. What She said! ^^^^^

    πŸ˜‰

    You wrote the first one when you were in school? Wow!.. as i read it it felt to me like you could have written it yesterday?

    Let it out Bwan… let that heart have some room to ‘mend’.

    There’s no need to share it with anyone, but Him.

    i have the feeling though that if you did there’d be a bunch of women reading it and thinking… yeah… me too! πŸ™‚

    Personal Opinion? – you’re very good! πŸ˜‰

    <B

    Reply
  9. “bunch of women”?? i think it’d resonate with a lot of people

    Reply
  10. My feedback…Keep writing and posting πŸ™‚

    Reply
  11. Thanks you guys. πŸ˜€ Y’all made me think a lot!

    I’m excited to put my favorite up that I wrote for my high school baccalaureate. But I’m saving that. πŸ˜‰

    Reply
  12. I love your poems, Brandy. I totally understand your hesitation in posting them, though! I don’t write poems, but I write songs just for me and for God. Very rarely do I share anything I have written with anyone unless I write it for one of my music therapy groups but that is WAY different than the other songs I write.

    Reply
  13. yeah, I only wrote in highschool…you know, when life was just “unbearable!” πŸ˜† I have no idea what I’d write about now. I don’t think I’ve ever written a “happy” poem. πŸ˜•

    Reply
  14. I LOVE the first one too! The price I must pay for this profit is loss! Anyone who has chosen to do “the right thing no matter how much it may hurt us and/or those we love” can HEAR that painful heart-mind struggle in your words.

    In the second one I can relate to using logical to avoid dealing with the pain of life altering events. Plus this opening (again with a killer opening): “Drawing up for myself in the silence of my mind a list…” I hear two levels. Of course drawing up a list in a very logical manner. But the second meaning that I got only after rereading it the 4 time: Withdrawing into ourselves… for our own sake. That’s true and poetic.

    And yes, like Heidi says, poetry is often more for the poet than the reader. Sometimes it is simply free therapy. (Well, there is time)

    And yes, like Alece and others say, don’t underestimate yourself, just write.

    Finally, here is a poem this post and thread reminded me of: Crashing Utopia: http://ricbooth.wordpress.com/2008/01/09/crashing-utopia/

    Reply
  15. Pingback: Memory Lane: 2nd Edition « MY DAO DAYS

  16. Pingback: Memory Lane: 3rd Edition « MY DAO DAYS

  17. Pingback: Memory Lane: 4th Edition « MY DAO DAYS

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