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Breaks my mommy heart

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*sigh*

It’s never good to start out a post with a *sigh.*

Jake told the boys earlier this week that we could all go to the movies on base and see Kung Fu Panda. They have been wanting to see it and every day since then Dylan asks “is it Saturday yet? is it Saturday yet?” and the look of excitement on his face was just so precious.

So, today is Saturday. We tell him this morning “yes Dylan, today is Saturday.” He is all pumped to go to the movies. I tell Jake that I’m probably not going to go, I’ll just stay home with Owen. I really wasn’t looking forward to sitting in a theater with a squirming baby who is itching to walk, plus I figured it could be a fun thing for the boys to do with Daddy….they see me all week, but they never get to do something special with just Daddy.

Naptime rolls around. The boys had been outside ALL morning and afternoon. 2:30. Naptime. Dylan is quite hysterical because he is so tired. We tell the boys that if they don’t sleep during naptime, no movie. The movie started right before their bedtime so it was neccessary that they sleep. Aidan slept like a champ. Dylan however, did not. I even tried laying down with him so he’d sleep, but no. He got up three times. 1) “I need to peeeeeeeee.”   2) “oh,um, no, I need to poop now.”  3) “I fought I heard somefing.” Yeah. Sure.  You may be thinking “but the kid had to pee and poop and he heard something!” but really, every.single.time. he is supposed to be sleeping he spaces out his pee’s and poop’s and hearing of things so perfectly that he wastes his whole nap. He has it down to a fine art. 😕  (like right now, he’s in bed no more than 10 minutes and he’s been down here twice. *grumble*) 2 hours later, naptime is over, and Dylan didn’t ever go to sleep. Aidan slept like a champ so of course, he gets to go to the movie. Dylan however, no movie. 😦

Oh did he ever cry and cry and scream and beg and cry some more. I felt so bad. So awful. We explained to him that if he wanted to go he needed to sleep. Not just lay there and play, but sleep. And I KNOW he was tired b/c when I was laying with him those few minutes, he dozed a couple of times but then woke back up with a jolt and started fidgeting and playing with the shapes on his walls and the dirt under his finger nails.

I told him that he still had time to get a decent nap in, if he wanted to go back to his room. He opted not to. He wanted to go play outside. Later he tells us about how he is going to the movie. 😦 We correct him. We went through this cycle I don’t know how many times. *sigh*

Then the time came for Daddy and Aidan to leave. Oh did Dylan bawl. At that moment I wanted to say “okay you can go! Go! Go! Go! And have fun!!” But I didn’t. I told Jake I wanted to just let him go and he said “fine, but I really don’t want to deal with a crab.” I said “no b/c if we break and let him go then he’ll think he can break us next time he wants to do something.” I hate that part.

I hate that Dylan didn’t get to go to the movie. I really really do. It hurts my mommy heart.

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20 responses »

  1. i know it sucks, but (from this non-mother’s point of view) you did the right thing by sticking to your decision. and i know you know that, but it does still suck. and i understand how it hurts your heart.

    sorry, friend.

    love you.

    Reply
  2. Thank you sweet friend. I know it was good to stick to my guns, but man oh man did it hurt. I felt like I was going to cry. This is the first time we’ve kept him from doing something *this big* like going to a big boy movie with Daddy. He’s been with my mom before, but never with one of us.

    Jake and Aidan just got home a few minutes ago and Aidan came in doing “Kung Fu” hahaha!! Jake went up to talk to Dylan about how he was sad that he couldn’t go with them and Dylan was OUT. I think he fell asleep in about 5 minutes…..once he was done with all his peeing for the night. 😆 HAHA!!!

    Love you too! 😀

    Reply
  3. awwww, that is heartbreaking…

    Reply
  4. oh, brandy. like alece, i’m not even a mom, and that gets my heart too…but the consistency in that shows that you place his character above jack black’s debut as a panda. I hope to be as good of a mom as you someday [someday WAAAAAY FAR AWAY]…you and tam should write a book!!!

    Reply
  5. Poor Dill, good thing I was not there I would have took him out the back door! I did nothing but cause problems when I was at your house! LOL How you stuck with it I will only understand when the day comes for me to be a mom!

    Reply
  6. sorry you had to go through that 😦 it really does hurt our mommy hearts when we have to be the enforcer of rules..but I know with my first one..I caved all the time..and she was hard in her teen years..she just didn’t get it..my bad..I learned..and sometimes it really does hurt us more than them 😯 I didn’t use to believe my mom when she said that..now I know. Love you Bwan! real funny forwards..keep them coming..when I get something I will send it to you. 🙂

    Reply
  7. you ARE a good Mom Muffin.

    The most important thing Kids need is LOVE from their parents.

    It is NOT love when we cave in to their wants every time.

    With love comes a need for some form of discipline. – so good on you for sticking with yours. 🙂

    The only thing is… kids can grow and change quickly as they grow up right?

    sometimes we don’t fully ‘allow’ for that. Dylan seems to be outgrowing the ‘need’ to nap? or am i maybe getting that ‘wrong’??? The day will come when d can ‘go’ all day long Hun, is it right to ‘punish’ him for that??

    Even if he can be cranky as a result?

    I don’t envy you one bit here B i never quite figured out why women are so KEEN on having kids?? cos absolutley NOTHING about having raising them is ‘easy’ – sighhhh.

    i get that there are rewards in it… but even so! 😉

    love you muffin – hang in there, kiddo!

    <B

    Reply
  8. Love dear, you hit the nail on the head. You’re good. 😉

    I think the reason I felt so heartbroken over it for him was I KNEW I shouldn’t have demanded he sleep (b/c he doesn’t always at nap/rest time), but once I said it, I had to stick to it. I hate that. It’s not the first time I spoke too soon and made an ultimatum that I had to stick to and regretted it. If I didn’t think the long term effects of caving in would have been bad, I would have let him go. But I could just see later on him thinking “oh, last time I threw a colossal fit and she caved, maybe that’ll work again.” So yeah, while I knew I probably shouldn’t have made that ultimatum, I had to stick to it. *sigh* Such a fine line, and it sucks.

    You are right too, Dylan IS outgrowing a need for a nap everyday, and usually I just tell him to lay there and rest, he doesn’t have to sleep. *sigh* But Jake and I thought using the movie to get him to sleep would work, and we were so wrong.

    Today I told him he could play quietly in his room for an hour and then rest the second hour. That seemed to work pretty well. And without napping he needs to go to bed earlier, so that works better for us. 😉

    The learning curve for parenting sucks. 😕 BUT, the reward is great. Greater than anything else there is. In my opinion. 😉 heehee

    Anna, I’m sure you’ve had those moments? 😉

    Cathi, I DO care about his character, and it is so hard helping to form that when they are this age. 😕 And, Tam IS writing a book. ha ha 😆 Don’t let my horror stories make you wait longer for those babies. heehee ha ha ha ho ho heee

    Rachelle, I could have put you in timeout with the boys for running in the house. 😆 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!

    Darla, I feel sometimes like I am hard on Dylan. Mostly b/c he’s the guinea pig kid, and b/c he’s the firstborn, oldest. That should make me parent differently with him, but so far…no. I see so much of myself in him it scares me. *sigh* You’d think that would make it easier huh? 😉

    Reply
  9. I think I had timeouts a couples times over there! LOL those are awesome memories! Before I know it they are going to be to big to do that any more and I will be to old!

    Reply
  10. You’re already too old. HAHAHAH!!!
    (I’m laughing really hard…really!!!)

    😆 😆 😆 😆

    Reply
  11. What! Jezz I think you are the first to actually agree with me!!! At least we can get old together!!! HA

    Reply
  12. My knees are already giving out on me. 😯 Not kidding at all. Some days I can barely get up the stares. 😦 I need to see a doctore actually. It’s getting pretty bad. Stupid old knees. I limp around the house sometimes. *sigh*

    Reply
  13. STARES?!?!

    Seriously, I know how to spell.

    Stairs.

    see.

    Reply
  14. lol, is it bad that I did not even notice that! LOL, ya my knee is pretty bad but I blame it on basketball! You, it can be blamed on having three boys! And that I blame on Jake!!! LOL I think Myriah and I always wanted to see a little Brandy running around!

    Reply
  15. OK that broke my aunt heart too.
    But, I must say I am proud of you
    He surely knows you mean business.
    No matter how hard I crack down on Kambrie it always comes back to knowing I want to raise an obedient child of God that isnt spawn of Satan. ha ha
    I really dont want my kid to be “that kid” that no one wants to be around b/c they are a holy terror.

    You did good. Even though it hurt. :- (

    Reply
  16. me too. 😦
    I still do. *sigh* But it will never be.

    Reply
  17. I’m off to bed….talk to you later!!!

    😀

    ((hugs))

    ♥ 😉

    Reply
  18. How about I have a little shell instead! I have the feeling that my kids will be all girls!

    Reply
  19. T, sometimes I think he IS a holy terror, or at least turning into one. I’ve seen such a change over him the past few months. *sigh* Makes my heart sad. He seems….frustrated.

    My movie story makes me think of when you told K if she didn’t let you do her hair you guys wouldn’t go somewhere…I can’t remember where…and then you were mad b/c you wanted to go too. haha! Totally sucks!

    I had REALLY wanted him to go to that movie too. 😦

    Reply
  20. a little Shell, awww that would be cute!!!

    I must say, I’d rather stick my all boys than all girls ANY DAY! 😯 😆

    Night girls!

    Reply

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